Thursday, June 21, 2012

Week 2..and your chance for solicited advice!

We are in survival mode here in week 2.  I am loving eary minute of Emma, and feel blessed to be her mother.  But there are definately challenging moments.  Brent went back to work on Monday, so that's an added stressor.  My mom and dad have been over, and some good friends as well.  Thankfully, Brent is off Friday, so we have a 3 day weekend to try and recoop and get into a routine.  We are still trying to figure out what life is like with a newborn, and how to be parents:)

We normally wake up around 6:30am and Brent starts to get ready for work.  Emma is either in my arms or his, as we fell asleep like that from the night.  I know this is bad, and I hate that she is getting in this habit, so hopefully we can break it this weekend.  The only place she has slept so far is the carseat, our arms, and once in the afternoon in the crib, in her swaddlepod.  I am nervous about her sleeping on her back - which is ridiculous since that is the safest place for them, I know.  I don't know whether she needs to be swaddled all the time if she sleeps on her back or not.  I feel better with her reclined. She normally wakes to feed by 8am, right about the time Brent needs to leave for work - so it's crisis mode for me to get up and get everything set up downstairs.  I need to get used to just letting her be - I don't need to be watching her all the time or holding her.  She will cry, and that has to be alright.  Right now, her feedings are way too close together.  I have searched and tried, and the best I can conclude is that she is not getting enough when she feeds from the breast.  Sorry if this is too much info...  I had troubles with her latching on last week so we started pumping just in case and feeding her from a bottle.  If we feed her from the bottle, she drinks 2-4 ounces in one sitting and can go 3+ hours without needing to be fed.  On the boob, she just eats for a about 10-15 minutes (maybe) and falls asleep.  No matter what I try, she doesn't want to eat more.  Those feedings were taking over an hour and then she was wanting to eat every hour because she was not satisfied.  It was hell.  Everytime I try to call the pediatrician, they tell me to go to a lactation consultant, but I did that, several times in the hospital, and once last week.  I honestly think I just need to let it go, and start bottle feeding.  I will still pump, but may need to add formula to supplement.  Any advice from moms out there would be great.  I am not giving up, but just need some sanity and need Emma to eat more.  She is supposed to get 20-24 ounces in a 24 hour period, and since I think she is only getting an ounce or less at the boob, she is not keeping up. 

We have been on 2 walks so far.  I would go for more, but is is WAY too hot out there for her.  I hear the temps are supposed to be cooler next week so I anticipate more outside time:)

I can't thank everyone enough for their visits, support, food, and love.  We have been blessed by each of you and hope to be able to provide the same support back:)

We haven't been anywhere this week. Last week, we had 2 doctor visits, a hospital visit, and went to Babies R Us for a few minutes.  I am starting to go insane.  Right about 3pm, I start to think about what my life used to be like - where I got out of the house, went places, showered...the normal.  I get pretty sad and feel pretty lonely.  Anybody that says they didn't feel this has to be lying.  I have ran to Food Lion twice while someone was here with Emma, but that's not exactly fun.  I am hoping to venture out to Target or even to Carolina Inn for an hour Friday....while Brent is here.  And maybe a family outing somewhere, anywhere...when did yall start going places with your newborn??  I am itching to get out of the house!!  I know this will pass, but it's so hard!  Plus - I want to show her off:) 

She is getting so strong! Her head muscles are noticeably stronger, and we may start tummy time this weekend.  She loves to be held and to be in her carseat.  She isn't a fan of baths, but now that her umbilical cord stump has fallen off, we will try again.  Her hair is so dark still, and her cheeks have to be the cutest things I have ever seen.  All I can do sometimes is just kiss them.  I am still getting used to the fact that this is MY child...the person who kicked me for 9 months and wiggled around in my belly.  She has the cutest cry when she's hungry, and the loudest..most blood curdling scream when she's starving!  We have not tried a paci yet, but are close to it.  If we stop breastfeeding, then I think it's a no brainer...again..feel free to chime in here:)  She still can't fit into things we have for her - just newborn onesies.  And I loathe onesies..they are so hard to get on and off.  I need to find some clothes that snap in the front and don't require me to go over her head and pull her whole arm through.  She is also still in newborn diapers. I think once we get this feeding thing figured out, she will grow like a weed..and I will of course miss my little sweet pea who couldn't fit into anything!

I can't say enough thank yous to my husband.  What a wonderful father and friend he has been.  I know it is hard to go to work all day, come home tired, and still give us his undivided attention.  He has been so hands on and we take turns at night feeding and soothing her.  He never gets frustrated with her, which is a huge help.  He helpls me keep perspective, and makes me feel at ease, even when she's screaming.  Our first Father's day was sorta a blurr, and we have decided to officially celebrate in a month..when I can get a proper gift and card together.

Coming along....the alphabet wall is on hold...and we still need hardware for the changing table.  We also need to hang a shelf, find a rug, and put up pictures.  Her stuff is pretty much organized, and I can't wait until both Emma, and I, are ready for her to use the room.  I say "I" since I am still feeling like it is my job to watch her all night long...and that fades a little each day (and with sleep deprivation setting in too).  I can't wait until she can use her crib and play around in her own room.

So...if you made it all the way through this post, you are awesome!  I know it was long, but I wanted to document what I could!  And, please excuse any typos...can having an 11 day old be my grammar excuse?!?  Hope everyone has a great week!!


  1. Elizabeth! I am praying for these first weeks...they are so challenging and so sweet at the same time! I will send you a FB msg answering some of your questions!

  2. take a deep breath-- and know you are doing a GREAT job! I am sending you a fb message now.... xoxoxo

  3. Call if you want to talk. I breastfed all 3 of mine and the first few weeks are so hard. Hang tight, you and Emma and Brent will survive and she will be a perfectly healthy, happy little girl!

  4. Hey girl! Congrats! She's beautiful :) it took Tily & I a good 2 weeks before we got into any sort of routine with nursing. I also supplemented with formula from the beginning because she wasn't gaining weight. Everyone has a dif story but its whatever is best for you & Emma! I am sure you are giving her exactly what she needs. If you need somewhere to go to get out - come see me, you know where!

  5. Keep going mama'! Breast feeding will get easier, jackson was the same way. I felt like my noob was out all day long along with the tears. She is still learning just like you. As for sleeping, Nash is still in the nap nanny beside our bed, give it a try. All babies are different and you are amazing. Prayers your way!

  6. Hang in there! I think of you daily and I'm sending prayers up your way! As a lot of others have said, do what you feel is best for you and Emma! She is absolutely beautiful! And it will take time to establish a routine. For us, it took me going back to work and Davis getting on a routine at daycare for me to finally feel like I had my act together! E-mailing you soon!